Allison Wonderland

"When I'm good, I'm very good...

bettedaviseyes84@yahoo.com (Allison Wonderland) — Sun, 29 Nov 2009 21:20:00 +0000

November 29, 2009

...but when I'm bad, I'm better."

Good ol' Mae West. She's always been a heroine of mine, too sexy for her time.

While writing the Looney Tunes entry, I got to thinking of another Madonna ditty I've always loved, "Hanky Panky," a tribute to those whose specialty is spanking.

Check out the lyrics to the song, which I think would make great background music for "Flick Chicks."

Please don't call a doctor, 'cause there's nothing wrong with me.
I just like things a little rough, and you better not disagree.

Curiouser and curiouser,
Allison Wonderland

P.S. I love that the record sleeve labels the song the "bare bottom" version.

Looney Tunes

bettedaviseyes84@yahoo.com (Allison Wonderland) — Sun, 29 Nov 2009 17:45:00 +0000

November 29, 2009

Did everyone have a terrific T-Day? Now comes the advent of Christmas crooners. Yep, folks, Rudolph's back on the radio. I'll admit, I have a few favorite holiday ditties - "Sleigh Ride," "Santa Baby," "My Christmas Wish" - but I much prefer nondenominational fare.

So I've decided to compile a list of my most adored (secular) songs. These are the tunes I can listen to incessantly, the songs that trigger squeals every time I hear them playing unexpectedly.

Here goes:

1) "This Used to Be My Playground" -- Madonna

2) "Brass in Pocket" -- The Pretenders

3) "I Won't Disagree" -- Kate Voegele

4) "Danny's Song" -- Loggins & Messina

5) "You're So Good When You're Bad" -- Charley Pride

Now, what tunes are you attuned to?

Curiouser and curiouser,
Allison Wonderland

P.S. Edible records (yep, those are cookies) made by Whipped Bakeshop.

Right on the Button

bettedaviseyes84@yahoo.com (Allison Wonderland) — Mon, 23 Nov 2009 21:08:00 +0000

November 23, 2009

As you may or may not know, I'm a big fan of Laverne & Shirley and, as such, have always had a burning yearning to wear my first initial on my chest.

So the other day, when I happened upon a jar of monogrammed buttons in a quaint little shop in town, I just had to have one. As I fished out a button with a pink cursive "A" stitched to a black background, I could not wait to get pinned.

My button was made by a company called Two's Company, but there are many lovely letters out there. These, for instance, are pretty cute.

On another note, many moons ago, I came upon a Laverne & Shirley shirt on eBay that had the words "Lesbians Are Hot" printed below their picture. Why oh why did I not snatch that baby up when I had the chance?

Has anyone else seen that shirt? Does anyone else have that shirt? Does anyone who has that shirt have the desire to let someone else have that shirt?

Just curious.

Curiouser and curiouser,
Allison Wonderland

Delta's Dawn

bettedaviseyes84@yahoo.com (Allison Wonderland) — Sun, 22 Nov 2009 03:01:00 +0000

November 21, 2009

Two entries in 24 hours. It's the dawn of a new day.

God bless Google News Alerts. I got a real kick out of this:

Delta of Venus, a late-night premium cable series starring Delta Burke as a sexually adventurous older woman.

Alas, it's not to be, hence the tvshowpunnames notation. But if it were to be, instead of not to be, you know I would be watching.

Religiously.

One of the things that came up when I typed "Delta of Venus" into a search engine was a voluminous, voluptuous village of vintage erotica. Let's mosey on down there, shall we?

Curiouser and curiouser,
Allison Wonderland

Everlasting Love

bettedaviseyes84@yahoo.com (Allison Wonderland) — Sat, 21 Nov 2009 17:39:00 +0000

November 21, 2009

I Do: An Anthology in Support of Marriage Equality has been joyfully reviewed at Joyfully Reviewed.

Reviewer Willow heralds the anthology as "the best collection of same-sex love stories I've come across in a while."

I especially love the way Willow synopsizes my story, "Holy Macaroni (and Cheese)" in the write-up:

The wedding picture was taken when they were in first grade. The love has lasted and lasted and lasted.

Curiouser and curiouser,
Allison Wonderland

Violets Are Blue

bettedaviseyes84@yahoo.com (Allison Wonderland) — Thu, 19 Nov 2009 03:40:00 +0000

November 18, 2009

I caught Violet Blue's interview with Oprah yesterday. Violet was delightful and insightful and spoke very eloquently on the distinction between pornography and erotica. I love that she described erotica as having layers, how it's both visceral and cerebral. I just wish that the episode had addressed literary erotica in addition to cinematic erotica.

Curiouser and curiouser,
Allison Wonderland

Bondage, Backsides, and Bettie Page

bettedaviseyes84@yahoo.com (Allison Wonderland) — Mon, 16 Nov 2009 16:56:00 +0000

November 16, 2009

Best Lesbian Erotica 2010 is now available! Cleis has released the collection early. The anthology, edited by Kathleen Warnock and selected and introduced by the band BETTY, contains my contribution, "Flick Chicks."

"Flick Chicks" tells the tale of two lovers who make films, period pieces, that are geared to the nostalgically-inclined. The flicks the chicks create are inspired by the stag films of the 50s that featured the 3 B's: bondage, backsides, and Bettie Page... as well as the occasional piece of equestrian equipment...

Check out this collage of notes I designed while crafting the story.

I'm a very visual person, and the images combined with the words really brought the story to fruition on the page.

Curiouser and curiouser,
Allison Wonderland

Heads or Tales?

bettedaviseyes84@yahoo.com (Allison Wonderland) — Fri, 13 Nov 2009 16:01:00 +0000

November 13, 2009

I'll take tales, please.

Fairy tales, that is.

Check out this article, "Rise of the Fantasy and Fairytale," by Louise Ridley of the London Evening Standard. Kristina Wright, editor of Fairy Tale Lust, offers her input on the revived popularity of the genres.

Curiouser and curiouser,
Allison Wonderland

Sleeping Your Way to the Bottom

bettedaviseyes84@yahoo.com (Allison Wonderland) — Wed, 11 Nov 2009 17:00:00 +0000

November 11, 2009

You've all heard of sleeping your way to the top, but I'll bet you've never heard of sleeping your way to the bottom...

Got news on the anthology front! My short story, "Mind Your Peas and Qs," will be included in the forthcoming collection, Fairy Tale Lust: Erotic Fantasies for Women. This anthology is edited by Kristina Wright and will be published by Cleis Press in the spring of 2010.

My contribution re-envisions the story of the princess and the pea. In "Mind Your Peas and Qs," bachelors vie for the affections of a princess by proving their worth, their wealth, and their willingness to perform through the pleasure of pain.

In order to prove that he is a loyal royal, a man must be able to feel a pea wedged beneath a heap of 20 mattresses. The princess and the candidate will engage in fornication every night for three weeks. With each passing day, one mattress will be removed from the pile-high pyramid, diminishing the distance between the prince and the pea, bringing him closer and closer to the source of his suffering.

Will he be able to, um, keep up the good work and keep the princess happy?

Will he succeed in sleeping his way to the bottom?

Curiouser and curiouser,
Allison Wonderland

Strip to My Lou, My Darling

bettedaviseyes84@yahoo.com (Allison Wonderland) — Mon, 09 Nov 2009 20:25:00 +0000

November 9, 2009

Missed my three updates per week minimum last week.

{hangs head in shame}

I'll make up for it, though, don't worry.

I shall start my penance by sharing a super sexy striptease featuring the lady of the House, Dr. Lisa Cuddy, who takes it almost all off in House's head in "House's Head" from the fourth season of the series.

This is the uncut version of the scene that originally aired on TV. She's so, you know, Jewcy. And... yum. Yeah, yum. That pretty much yums - er, sums - it up.

Here you are.

Enjoy!

Curiouser and curiouser,
Allison Wonderland

Count Me In

bettedaviseyes84@yahoo.com (Allison Wonderland) — Thu, 05 Nov 2009 22:50:00 +0000

November 5, 2009

Did you know that thus far, readers have downloaded A Slip of the Lip 18,534 times?

Wow.

I would say that's impressive, except that goes without saying.

To add yourself to the ranks of lip-lock loving readers, check out the e-book here. My contribution is called "Sugar High," and the entire collection is absolutely free.

Curiouser and curiouser,
Allison Wonderland

Tiptop & Topnotch

bettedaviseyes84@yahoo.com (Allison Wonderland) — Tue, 03 Nov 2009 16:57:00 +0000

November 3, 2009

I Do: An Anthology in Support of Marriage Equality, which includes my story "Holy Macaroni (and Cheese)," is a Top Pick on Dark Diva Reviews.

{Insert salacious sentiment about being on top.}

Readers may vote for the collection from now until November 7 as their favorite book reviewed during the month of October.

To access the poll, please click here.

Curiouser and curiouser,
Allison Wonderland

P.S. Marvelous macaroni art by Valerie Spencer.

The Ghostess with the Mostest

bettedaviseyes84@yahoo.com (Allison Wonderland) — Sat, 31 Oct 2009 16:04:00 +0000

October 31, 2009

I adore Halloween - chomping on candy corn, scooping the goop out of plump round pumpkins, and, of course, playing dress-up.

Being yourself is way overrated. Be whoever you darn well want to be.

I usually dress up as Like a Virgin-esque Madonna. I've also been Laverne DeFazio ('cause she's one L of a dame), a bumblebee, and a chocolate sandwich cookie.

But what I haven't been, what I really should be, is Alice in Wonderland. I think I'd look pretty fetching in that blue and white frock you see before you. Actually, that's one of the tamest Alice outfits I've come across.

Next year, perhaps. Perhaps next year I will discover, as the lyrics to Raven-Symoné's "Alice" profess, just how deep the rabbit hole goes.

Curiouser and curiouser,
Allison Wonderland

Dot, Dot, What a Girl I Got

bettedaviseyes84@yahoo.com (Allison Wonderland) — Thu, 29 Oct 2009 18:24:00 +0000

October 29, 2009

When we shower together, we don't have to turn on hot.

I saw the coolest thing at Barnes & Noble yesterday.

It's an erotic connect-the-dots calendar.

Isn't that neat? You know, for something that's heterosexist?

If you are hot to dot... er, trot... well, actually, both work pretty well in this instance... then I think this novelty is right up your alley.

Curiouser and curiouser,
Allison Wonderland

Five Delightful Divas

bettedaviseyes84@yahoo.com (Allison Wonderland) — Tue, 27 Oct 2009 20:04:00 +0000

October 27, 2009

Okay, so only four delightful divas are featured in that photo. If you want to see five delightful divas, you'll have to check out this review of I Do: An Anthology in Support of Marriage Equality.

Lit critic Jaime says that the anthology "is definitely worth the money" and "enjoyed the conversational tone" of my story, though apparently not the spelling of my name (it's double-L Allison, please). The reviewer also liked my piece because "it's so nice to think [love] can happen as naturally as breathing."

It's great when readers get your work, isn't it?

Curiouser and curiouser,
Allison Wonderland

Don't Get Fresh with Me

bettedaviseyes84@yahoo.com (Allison Wonderland) — Sat, 24 Oct 2009 18:21:00 +0000

October 24, 2009

I was at a play the other day, and during intermission, the cast held a raffle.

My ticket got picked out of the fishbowl.

I got - I kid you not - a Bettie Page air freshener.

Bikini-scented.

Yum.

Sure beats those scratch-and-sniff stickers, doesn't it?

Curiouser and curiouser,
Allison Wonderland

Please and Spank You

bettedaviseyes84@yahoo.com (Allison Wonderland) — Thu, 22 Oct 2009 17:03:00 +0000

October 22, 2009

Ain't life sweet? I've got a story in the line-up for Sweet Love: Erotic Fantasies for Couples. This anthology is edited by sexpert Violet Blue and will be published by Cleis Press in April of 2010.

Violet's collection will feature my story, "A Week and a Whip," about a woman and her man (yes, I'm just as shocked as you are) enacting a first-time fantasy. Marnie's live-in lover Jesse is lacking in libido, and she's determined to kick his sex drive back into gear. With the aid of bondage tape...

...and the world's cutest whip...

...Marnie sets out to erectify - er, rectify - the problem.

You may pre-order Sweet Love from Amazon.

Curiouser and curiouser,
Allison Wonderland

The Eight Finest Breasts in Georgia...

bettedaviseyes84@yahoo.com (Allison Wonderland) — Mon, 19 Oct 2009 19:04:00 +0000

October 19, 2009

...and the top two.

Ohhh, Suzannah...

So now that I, a feminist, have completely objectified the feminists on a feminist's show -- and have completely overused the word "feminist" -- I'd like to discuss Designing Women for a bit.

I totally love this sitcom, not because of the, um, eye candy factor, but because it hardly even feels like a sitcom. In addition to the sultry Sapphic subtext between Mary Jo and Suzanne, the series addresses and debunks practically every kind of prejudice in existence: sexism, misogyny, homophobia, racism, classism, ageism, sizeism. You name it, they've got it covered.

Character breakdown...

Mary Jo. Mary Jo could be my doppelganger. (I've always wanted to use that word.) She's much more assertive and "brimming with bravado and self-confidence" than she realizes, and if I weren't so humble, I'd say the same thing about myself.

Julia. My heroine. Joan Crawford reincarnated, The Terminator is the epitome of eloquence and elegance. Julia says everything out loud that I have only ever had the gumption to say in writing. When in doubt of what to do about some grievous injustice, I often ask myself, WWJD? What would Julia do?

Charlene. My dream girl. If I knew Charlene in real life, I absolutely would have fallen for her the way that Dorothy's friend Jean falls for Rose in the "Isn't It Romantic?" episode of The Golden Girls.

Suzanne. The Rolls Royce of females, according to Mary Jo, who considers it an honor just to guard her brassiere at night. As irreverent as Suzanne is, I admire her absence of inhibitions. Suzanne says whatever she wants about whomever she wants to whomever she wants whenever she wants. Yes, that description applies to Julia as well, but unlike Julia, Suzanne doesn't think before she speaks. There's just something very liberating about that, y'know?

Speaking of Suzanne, I had a rather erotic dream about her last night. My recollection is fuzzy in terms of storyline, but the, um, sensual aspects of the dream are much more lucid.

Hmmm. I think I would describe the dream as a fusion of my stories "Bowl Me Over" and "Sugar High"...

Curiouser and curiouser,
Allison Wonderland

With This Ring

bettedaviseyes84@yahoo.com (Allison Wonderland) — Sat, 17 Oct 2009 15:53:00 +0000

October 17, 2009

I totally love this PSA promoting marriage equality.

It illuminates the absurdity of the entire debate.

Curiouser and curiouser,
Allison Wonderland

Get Some Action

bettedaviseyes84@yahoo.com (Allison Wonderland) — Thu, 15 Oct 2009 15:52:00 +0000

October 15, 2009

Coming Together is coming together with other green bloggers to participate in Blog Action Day 2009.

This year's topic is climate change. As a person prone to paranoia, climate change gives me the creeps. That being said, although I am positively rabid about recycling (I can be an ogre when it comes to the three R's), I'm something of a passive activist -- I sign online petitions, I click daily over at The Rainforest Site, I donate my writing to anthologies such as Coming Together: Al Fresco, all proceeds from which benefit Conservation International.

To read Coming Together's contribution to Blog Action Day, to enjoy the eco-conscious eloquence of series editor Alessia Brio, click here .

Curiouser and curiouser,
Allison Wonderland

Phil-antho-ropy

bettedaviseyes84@yahoo.com (Allison Wonderland) — Wed, 14 Oct 2009 15:04:00 +0000

October 14, 2009

If you haven't yet taken the plunge and purchased I Do: An Anthology in Support of Marriage Equality, you might be inclined to do so after checking out these story excerpts over at Dark Diva Reviews.

For a snippet of my f/f piece, "Holy Macaroni (and Cheese)," you'll have to check out fellow philanthropist P.A. Brown's blog. Still not persuaded? Take a gander at this review.

Curiouser and curiouser,
Allison Wonderland

His and Herstory

bettedaviseyes84@yahoo.com (Allison Wonderland) — Sat, 10 Oct 2009 19:59:00 +0000

October 10, 2009

You'll notice I've beefed up my links list recently.

(I link. Therefore, I am.)

I highly recommend checking out the two latest links:

Bosom Friends, a compendium of lesbian historical fiction, and its sibling, Speak Its Name, a compendium of gay historical fiction.

(Basically, same genre, different gender.)

My ideal period pieces are those that take place during the 1930s, 1940s, or the 1950s. I am especially interested in reading Tory's Tuesday, by Linda Kay Silva.

Curiouser and curiouser,
Allison Wonderland

The Cat's Meow

bettedaviseyes84@yahoo.com (Allison Wonderland) — Fri, 09 Oct 2009 18:25:00 +0000

October 9, 2009

I was just updating my author bios.

The second version first proclaimed, "Her non-sexual preferences consist of commas, carnivals, and cotton candy."

The second version now proclaims, "Allison's indulgences include cotton candy, kitten heels, and Old Hollywood glamour."

So, what's the back story?

Well, I kind of like to think of myself as a connoisseur of cotton candy and couldn't bear to omit that.

I love kitten heels because I totter in too-high heels, especially slender stilettos, so the kitten style offers comfort, cuteness, and a skosh of sex appeal. They are, quite simply, the cat's meow.

As for Old Hollywood glamour, it's all demure and all allure. I adore a classic look - chic and chaste and charming, like in this photo of glamour goddess Jean Harlow.

Wasn't she a stunner?

Curiouser and curiouser,
Allison Wonderland

Prescience of Mind

bettedaviseyes84@yahoo.com (Allison Wonderland) — Tue, 06 Oct 2009 15:38:00 +0000

October 5, 2009

I recently found a fan letter that I'd written to an actress performing in a Broadway musical. I'd seen the show, but didn't have time to stick around for an autograph. So, I wrote a letter, sent it to the theatre (along with an 8 X 10 photo and a SASE - I'm big on base-covering), and received the picture back signed one week later.

In my letter, dated April 17, 2007, I wrote:

...I might one day be über - or semi - famous. But not in the ritzy glitzy glam paparazzi princess sense. Nope, I plan to be counted among the cliterary elite. I mean... among the literary elite...

I composed this letter before I'd even heard of something called erotica. I would not write my first piece of erotic fiction, nor would I even contemplate entering the erotica orbit, until three months later. Now, I realize three months isn't much, but at the time, I was wholly absorbed in the present - exams, assignments, senior project, cap and gown - and hadn't really gotten into the specifics of my post-collegian existence.

Who knew I had psychic proclivities?

That's so... well, Raven.

Curiouser and curiouser,
Allison Wonderland

Homegirl

bettedaviseyes84@yahoo.com (Allison Wonderland) — Sun, 04 Oct 2009 00:50:00 +0000

October 3, 2009

Just visited the Web site of Homofactus Press and what do I see? Me! Right there on the homepage.

Scroll down and you'll see me, too. I'm the lovely lady in the bright blue sweater.

I feel like the cover girl on a magazine.

Curiouser and curiouser,
Allison Wonderland